Dr. Gunzburg,

I've found that my husband has a extreme online porn addiction. When I first found out he promised it was not a substitute to sex in our marriage...although the frequency of sex was diminshed...and he also promised to never do it again. That was two years ago and needless to say...he still continues, now he just lies about it. When I've had a chance to check his laptop I find that he's been online at least 5 days out of the week and for three or four hours a day. Sometimes this is even while he's working or supposed to be watching the kids. There is quite a bit of teen porn on there as well which I find particulary disturbing as well as incestual porn. We've been to counseling but I gave up when the counselor told me it's normal male behavior and that he sympathizes with pedophiles???!!! We've gone a month at a time without sex..not because of me...because he has no desire for it anymore. I have to argue with him to get him to have sex with me and honestly...it's leaves me feeling like I wasn't even there. He pretty much is more focused on what he's getting out of it and seems to care less if I'm satisfied. I know he loves me but he does not want to discuss this behavior or take responsibility for how it's affecting me. I'm contemplating leaving him as you can imagine that I feel like he uses the porn in place of being intimate with me. FYI...my husband just turned 50 and we've only been married two years so this has been going on pretty much since we've been married. I'm at my wit's end at this point and just don't know what my next step should be.

--Lisa